Balancing relationships before socializing is crucial. If we don't know how to push and pull, sometimes we push too much, making others afraid to approach. Or sometimes pulling too much can make the other person lack a sense of challenge. The push pull method is an ambiguous magic that triggers the excitement of love. In fact, no matter to what extent the relationship is, the thing that a relationship requires is always one, and that is' balance '. Once a relationship becomes "out of balance", it is easy for the relationship to end or become unattractive. If we don't know how to push and pull, sometimes we push too much, pushing others away or making them afraid to approach. Or sometimes we may pull too much, and we will let the other party eat us.
So, the significance of pushing and pulling lies in "warming up emotions while maintaining balance". So, what is the meaning of pushing and pulling individually? Pushing is the act of pulling away, denying, giving NEG, rejecting, roast, etc., which can produce the effect of "making the other person feel that you are not interested in him". Pull is a behavior that brings the other person closer, affirms, praises, and makes long-term eye contact, which can have the effect of "making them feel like they have a chance".
And what is' relationship balance 'before a relationship? If you want to be a 'desirable' girl, which of the following women do you think men prefer? Is it a woman who allows herself to do whatever she wants, or is it a bit challenging? The answer is: 'Both want'. But only the latter can make people feel the "excitement of love". Although the former is easy to promote and the relationship should be no problem, it can make people easily feel "bored". The latter will make people "want to cherish" and "want to love".
Pushing and pulling should be separated from your inner state
Most of them only know one type, either they can only push or pull. People who usually only push, afraid of being hurt, failed, relying on others, and afraid of others discovering their true self that is not worth being loved, become only "pushing" and simply use the principle of not getting close to others as their protective shield to isolate those who may not accept their true appearance. People who only know how to pull can easily be disrespected, undervalued, or even looked down upon by men, becoming the "tasteless eater, regretful to abandon" person, sometimes also known as the "spare tire".
Of course, to make men feel excited about their love relationship, it's not just about "passing messages", but more about "face-to-face chatting and contact" to make men fall for you! The push pull method is not only used before communication, but also important after communication, with different usages. The application layer can be divided into "push" and "pull" in terms of language, body movements, tone, body contact, intonation, wording, etc. Sometimes the push of language can be combined with the pull of the body to generate confusing information. Such ambiguity can easily create a sense of excitement in love.
We will discuss the push-pull method at two levels:
1、 Body language
1. Open body language (pulling): palms and inner arms facing outward, body muscles relaxed, touching, approaching, soft eyes, smiles, eye contact
2. Defensive body language (push): palms, outer arms facing outward, and even slightly arched and concentrated, with sharp and focused eyes, away from, refusing, tense muscles, covering oneself with something (perhaps crossed hands, bags, etc.) between oneself and others, and refusing to make eye contact
2、 Reaction level
1. Good response (pull): praise, affirmation, agreement, serious listening, excited emotions and responses, short reaction time, feeling of care, emotions influenced by the other party, tone of voice fluctuation, many auxiliary words, willingness to respond to stimuli thrown by the other party, willingness to overcome difficulties, and sincere attitude
2. Defensive, unresponsive (pushing): roast, negation, disapproval, random perfunctory, unresponsive, careless, long reaction time, emotion not affected by the other party, calm, indifferent, tone without any fluctuation, concise words, less stimulation for the other party, better response, unwilling to eliminate difficulties, insincere and glib.
But no matter how you push or pull in behavior, it must be separated from your inner state. Your inner state is not directly related to your behavior. The reason why a master is a master is that you can divide "behavior" and "inner state" into two things. When to use push and when to use pull, it is also necessary to judge which type of "push" the other party usually accepts. If the person who usually receives "push" needs to do more "pull" actions. If people who usually receive "pull" often need to arrange more "push" elements.