Mrs. Beck:
Why should I punish him
I resigned and went home in the spring of 2003. At that time, my husband's company expanded. All businesses are on track. After resignation. I soon joined a ladies' club. The members of the ladies' club are rich and idle women. There are six of us. Let's get together. One of the topics discussed every day is how to tie my husband's heart.
After returning home, I take my husband's life as my life. If he is happy, I will be in a good mood all day; He is in a bad mood when he comes home. I will also be depressed by him. Maybe because I'm too sensitive, I'm becoming picky about him. I am particularly concerned about his attitude towards me and the details. We are arguing more and more frequently. Sometimes, it is really just for some trivial matters, after the event. I reflect on myself. I also think it is too harsh on my husband. But I just can't tolerate his neglect of me.
At first, when we had conflicts. I fight with him. Later, I became a little discouraged. I found it harder to transform a man than to capture bin Laden alive. He will always promise you anything at this time. At that time, I forgot everything. The most annoying thing is that after a quarrel. He tried to coax you into bed again with sweet words, and then it seemed that everything was over. Everything will be the same tomorrow.
Later I thought. Is it true that all men think they should leave the problem in bed. Put your wife to bed. Will all contradictions be solved? In this way, I feel determined not to let him succeed. Maybe it's a kind of revenge, I think. Since the husband thinks that he can solve the problem by making love, and since he cares about sex so much, I won't let him get sex.
My original intention is to let him pay attention to the problems between us. Don't think these problems are unimportant, and don't think these problems can be passed if you are confused. I really didn't think of it. Therefore, he made more complaints about me, which led to deeper cracks in our relationship between husband and wife.
Mr. An Junjun:
Her punishment hurt me
I have been married to her for three years. At first, our emotional life was very harmonious. I think if it wasn't for me to become the general manager of the company, if it wasn't for her to go home and become a full-time wife. Our relationship may not have such problems.
Two years ago, I started a computer company. The company's business is very good, and it can generate millions of income every year. She used to work in an advertising company. After giving birth, I didn't want her to work so hard. Advise her to go home and become a full-time wife, anyway I can support her and her children.
Looking back now, is it true that if a woman does not have her own career, she will only focus on her family or husband. What good is it? I remember that less than half a year after she came home, she paid special attention to my daily whereabouts. I almost had to ask for instructions early and report late every day, otherwise she would be unhappy.
The first time was half a year ago. I want to recruit an assistant. The male manager has a female secretary, which is very normal. But in her view, there is a female secretary beside me, as if there was a time bomb. She insisted that I invite a male secretary. For this matter, one night. We had a big fight. As a result, she cried very sad and said that I was not considerate of her and did not love her.
When she cried, my heart softened. We used to quarrel, but it is often "the end of the bed quarrels with the end of the bed", as long as we get to the bed. Everything can be solved. So I tried to coax her to bed as before, but she was surprisingly stubborn that day. No matter how hard and soft I tried, she wouldn't give in. Later, I had to promise her not to hire a female secretary. She was willing to compromise and reluctantly made love with me.
To be honest, I felt like doing business at that time.
I think it may be that she has tasted the sweetness from it. Since then, she has never accepted it. As long as I don't agree to her request or make her unhappy about something, she refuses to make love with me. I remember that a few months ago, she wanted to buy a coat. I promised to buy it for her before going out in the morning, but maybe I forgot about it because of my busy work. After that, I apologized to her and promised to buy it tomorrow, but she just wouldn't forgive me. She insisted that I didn't have her in my heart. But God testified, how can she immediately rise to the height of love and non-love for such a thing?
As a result, she refused to make love with me that night. I tried to coax her, but she just refused to promise me. Later. I also lost my patience and went to force her. Unexpectedly, she kicked me in the struggle. That foot. It completely chills me. I think we are called husband and wife? I don't even have any rights for my husband. After that. I will never take the initiative to make love with her again. What saddens me most is. I found it difficult for me to mention sexual interest when she came to me.
Chat record of psychological consultation room
Consultant: Tell the truth. None of you want to see this situation today?
Becko: I didn't think it would be so serious. In fact, I do this because I care too much about him. I have no other purpose, but I hope he can listen to my opinions on many things and respect me more.
Counselor: You punish him with sex. Why? Do you think this method will work?
Beck (very sad): I don't know, but do I have any other way? Sometimes, I feel helpless. I think my husband and I may have some problems in communication. I want to tell him some of my opinions. He often agrees on the surface, but in fact he doesn't care. I hate him doing this, and think he doesn't care about me. Before marriage, we were not like this.
Counselor: How about before marriage?
Beck: At that time, I asked him to do it seriously. I don't understand why he seems to be different after marriage?
Consultant: That is to say. Sometimes you don't want to have sex with your husband, just to make him submit. But in your heart, you want to be intimate with him.
Beck: Yes.
Counselor: Well, let me ask Mr. An a question. Do you love your wife? Look her in the eyes carefully and answer.
An Junjun (without hesitation): I love her... but sometimes I hate her threatening me with sex.
Counselor: Have you thought about it for your wife? Why did she do this?
An Junjun: She wants me to meet any of her requirements, but she doesn't know. If she uses sex to blackmail, this is exactly what I hate most. I feel like I'm making a deal with her.
Counselor: But she doesn't want to do it. She said she had no better way.
An Junjun (pondered for a while): Maybe. After all, I have the leading position in the economy at home. I sometimes do something wrong.