Recently, a map of gentle girls has become popular on the Internet: girls in Beijing, Tianjin and Hebei, girls in Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai "understand life", girls in Sichuan and Chongqing "have a soft heart", girls in Northeast China "dare to love and hate", girls in Inner Mongolia "are insulated from affectation", girls in Hubei "have high intelligence quotient"... It has become a hot topic among men for a while, and many men sigh that it is not easy to marry a good wife.
Women are popular in modern society. This word is sometimes commendatory. It means that women are capable and shrewd, and like men, they can make a difference in the workplace; But sometimes it is derogatory, which means that women are too strong in family life, bossing men around and quarrelling with their husbands unreasonably. This is what men are afraid of, so now gentle and kind women are even better for men.
A beautiful family is the result of the joint efforts of two people. A warm greeting can make a man smile, and a compliment can make a woman feel happy. Isn't it like heaven? Without respect, being despised and ridiculed by others, is it not a hell-like life?
If the wife is always bossing and self-centered in a family, and the husband is always in the position of being commanded and commanded, then it is difficult to achieve a balance in such a marriage, and naturally it will not last long. So, how to change such a marriage?
Neither husband or wife can win alone. To win, two people win together. To lose, two people lose together. Therefore, treating each other with a gentle attitude and respecting each other's opinions is the basis for achieving a win-win marriage and life. But if you just take yourself as the core and ask others to listen to you in everything, and turn marriage into a dictatorship kingdom, you will only lose.
"Rainier effect" is often cited in the psychology of marriage and love to explain how to seek the balance of marriage and life. At the University of Washington, the salaries of professors are about 20% lower than those of other universities, but few choose to leave. This is because from the staff restaurant of the University of Washington, you can see one of the highest snow mountains in the Americas - Mount Rainier, which is an unparalleled advantage of other schools. It is for this reason that professors accepted lower wages than other schools and are willing to teach here for a long time.
There is always a similar problem in a failed marriage, that is, mutual respect and communication are not smooth. To get high marks in the life test of marriage, we must learn to respect the wishes of the other party and jointly create a perfect marriage life on the basis of equal dialogue. Abandoning those arbitrary practices and not treating your lover as your personal property will maximize these needs.
Marriage is a "struggle" between two people, but it can only be regarded as the final victory if we win together. One party can not create a perfect marriage life if it holds the commanding point alone. Only two people can work together to reach the peak of love.