Post Date April, 15 2023
Recently, I met a girl who wanted to meet. We are colleagues. I just can't talk to her. It's hard to find her FB. I'm going to make friends with her. She asked me to add! No rejection. But FB can't talk to her.
Some boys find girls cold and will keep trying to throw questions. Then I slowly found out how I changed from a situation where I couldn't talk to the other party very much to a situation where the other party couldn't read back. If we continue to work hard, we may end up being completely blocked by the other side.
Other boys will feel that the other side has no response, so they should say something easy and funny. If you are good at making fun, that's no problem. But it happens that many people are not good at joking, and they will offend each other unconsciously.
In fact, it may be time for you to admit the truth: when you can't find a topic after you try, or the other party is silent after you say two words, it is actually the expression that the woman is not interested in you.
Of course, you can constantly change topics, and of course, you can constantly insinuate about her interests and personality, and then try to find out what topics she is interested in. With such efforts, there may be several topics that can attract the attention of the other party. However, the attention may not be too long, and the two will return to silence again.
In a word, she is just not interested in you.
There are no people in the world who can't talk, only those who don't want to talk
For example, I am not a good conversationalist, so I found this phenomenon when I was young: if girls have no interest in me, they may be cold no matter how they find topics. Even if you want to go to the account of the phone or communication software, it is likely that you will talk more about the private message when you come back, but the other party will only occasionally reply one or two sentences. Otherwise, the other party will say that they want to take a bath or sleep. On the contrary, if a girl is interested in herself. Even when I finish the topic and don't know what to do, the other party will think of a lot of things to talk about. And she will be curious about me, want to know everything, and be willing to tell me everything. It may even become that she asks more questions than I ask. So whether it will be cold or not has nothing to do with whether I can chat or not.
As for not making jokes, it is also very important.
Many boys want to say that girls don't laugh and ignore themselves. Should I be joking and say something humorous? But my own experience is that humor is sometimes a gift. Some people have the ability to make plain things funny and attractive. Congratulations, please make good use of this talent! But those who don't have to pretend to be humorous may be even less funny, or even make a thing more boring or even vulgar. If a girl has no response to herself and makes jokes, it will usually be a big deduction. So be careful about your ability to tell jokes, and even more careful about the scale of your jokes.
So please be careful not to make these two mistakes. But not making mistakes is not enough to change the game. How can we solve this problem completely?
My suggestion is to try these points (there is no order, any implementation can be selected):
The other party is not interested in themselves. The first thing to think about is, of course, whether I am really not good at chatting? If the topic is boring? Or just say hello to each other? Or talk about issues that girls are not interested in?
If so, at least cultivate the topics that ordinary girls will be interested in, such as movies, restaurants, film and television news, celebrity trends, idol dramas, new novels, and at least know a little about the current popular topics. If you are very good at these things and the other party still doesn't talk to you, then at least you must be sure that it is not the topic, but the woman is not interested in herself.
Now look at the next point
Change your face
The other side doesn't want to be involved with us. The core is often that we have shortcomings (we don't have the value that the other side desires). So please don't blame the woman for ignoring others. First think about how you can improve yourself. But at least we should think of ways to make some changes in our external and internal, and strive to improve our connotation and value.
Of course, it takes time to accumulate.
But some things can be done immediately: for example, try different clothes, change hair style, and change your advance and retreat. Or take part in some life experience courses or activities, such as music, film, art, drama, wine tasting, dancing, etc. Let yourself become a more knowledgeable person from a person who only knows about work or an unpopular interest.
In the long run, we should strive to cultivate a broader appreciation, know more people, improve our social and economic status, and make our mind more powerful and open-minded. This is actually helpful for chasing girls or improving social value in the future.
Cold for a while
In addition, when you can't find a topic, please try to cool down according to the concept suggested in my book.
The purpose of cooling is not to break the relationship between them.
After all, you know that the woman is not interested in you. It's better to keep looking for topics, keep throwing questions, and finally read them. It's better to cool down as soon as possible and don't harass each other. Then silently try to grow up. After a period of time, you may start to find topics that you can talk to each other. It is also possible that after a period of time, the other person's life has changed, and she comes to you to ask you something you are good at. Even if the other party's job changes, your experience will help her, and she will start to raise your position. Then we can talk smoothly.
Turn your attention
Maybe you have no problem, but your level difference with the other party is too big. But if you change to a girl who is close to you, the other party thinks you are worth enough, and the two can have a smooth conversation.
At this time, please don't get too far. Don't be mistaken for believing that where there is a will, there is a way. Love is not a game of endurance, and constant harassment will not add points to your partner's heart. Even if you step back a hundred steps and let you catch up with each other, they may soon be unable to go down.
It's better to focus on women who can chat with themselves smoothly. This kind of relationship is easier for you to establish and maintain. It may also be a relatively good choice for you.
