I'm a three year old man, but after his divorce, he hooked up with the post 80s generation online

I am 43 years old this year. Three years ago, I gave up all my divorce and stayed with a man who is three years younger than me. He just did some business, didn't own a house, only had a second-hand car, and had a 13-year-old daughter. I took my 13-year-old daughter and lived with him. In the past two years or so, without obtaining a certificate, I also have my own job, working in a mountainous area more than 40 kilometers away from home, and I can only go home once in half a month, and the salary is not very high. However, I also get along very well. When I am not at home, he does business while cooking lunch for my two daughters. When I am on vacation, I also take care of my business and family for almost a week, which can be said to be a happy combination.

Over the past two years, he has enjoyed chatting and meeting women around WeChat Canada. We have quarrelled and quarrelled over this issue, and I also want to leave him, but I really don't want to part with him. Moreover, in order to be with him at the beginning, I lost my family and friendship, and all thought that I had found a unreliable man, and no one had dealings with me. I also gave up my house, dignity, and personality, I followed him with my daughter and nothing.

"This time, he only spent two months online searching for a post 80s generation, and on August 20th, he asked me for help. I thought his business was not good, so I went to work and left. Unexpectedly, I came back on the 27th. He said that I was old and he wanted to have a child of his own, so he let me go. I said I wouldn't leave, but in the end, nobody said anything. He didn't do business any more those days, spending the day and night with that woman.". On the evening of the 30th, I finally called him to go home. The woman picked up the phone and scolded me for being an old woman or a psychopath, accusing me of calling him. She also came back late at night to sleep on the sofa alone. On the 31st, I sorted out my belongings and said that you decided on your own, so I moved out. When I left, I asked him to pay me 3000 yuan in rent. If he didn't, I would ask for it every day, but later, I did. However, on the 7th, I found myself pregnant, so I called him to say, Either he didn't answer or he hung up on something and never told him.

The day before yesterday afternoon, I said that he would not go back to his rental house. I wanted to talk about the pregnancy. He decisively said no, maybe he was stimulated again. Yesterday morning, I found myself bleeding, so I went to the hospital and had an abortion. I called him back to my rental house. He said that he had been calm for a while, didn't say anything, and there was no comfort left. Yesterday noon, I braved my weak body and braved the rain to ride my motorcycle to him, asking him to take me to the station. I came to work in the mountain area, but I didn't expect to get dizzy, fall down, and sprain my foot when I got off. He could see my movements on WeChat, but even without a word of greeting, my heart was cold.

Last afternoon, I saw a song he left for that woman in his dynamic. I cried after listening to it. Actually, it's also a state I have for him at present. He promised to let my daughter eat and stay with him. After all, my daughter is only 13 years old, and I work with her, so I don't know what to do? I wonder if my daughter can stay with him? Also, at present, my mobile phone number is a package made by him, and he hasn't logged me off. I've been using his phone bill, and I don't understand his purpose? At work, I still have to pretend to be happy because everyone knows that he is my husband's and he often picks me up and takes me home. One reason I'm struggling is that I still don't want to leave him. Another reason is that I don't have money, I don't have a salary if I don't work, and nearly 2000 yuan a month. I feel like I don't have enough time with my daughter, so I don't know what to do? "The post 80s generation has their own husband and a girl around 5 years old. They own a small store and are running something. I learned this by peeking at their chat records.". Could you please help me and tell me what to do? thank you.

reply:

Hello, at the beginning, you were so desperate for the relationship you wanted. Perhaps you would ignore the opposition of your family and jump into the arms of this man who is three years younger than you without hesitation. Facts have proven that your vision is very poor, and it is precisely because of your initial irrational, willful, and ego that led to the result of being hurt today. "The man you chose is actually very poor. I don't know how your ex husband is. If you divorced for this man, does it mean you had relationships and feelings with this man before the divorce, or did this man constantly seduce you and make you engage in selfish gossip?"?

Marriage is not a child's play, it's not that simple as being separated, it's not that being together with anyone is so casual. When you're with this man, you're just cohabiting, and you don't have a license. You're not a legal couple, and you're not protected by the law. That means that you and this man are both free and can freely interact with other women, so what can you do with him? Why don't you get a certificate? Haven't you thought about whether you can live together for a long time? The relationship hasn't reached that deep yet.

I can see that this man is not a good bird. When you were not divorced, he went to hook up with you, right? After being with you, he went to hook up with the post 80s generation who has a family and children. Can you expect such a man to live a stable and happy life with him? Dream, of course, this man can give you money to spend, right? Do you think you have a poor earning power and cannot support yourself and your children, so you need to rely on this man to improve your mother and daughter's help? But can you really count on him? If you can, then I support you. As long as that man is cheap and willing to give your mother and daughter money, you can also count on your ability, but if you can't count on it, what should you do? Can't you still work with your own hands?

So, what is a happy marriage and what is true love? You don't understand it at all. You still need to further cultivate and mature yourself from the inside out. Otherwise, you will have a bias in your vision of men. If you don't want to stand on your own, have self-respect, and be willing to compromise and strive for perfection, then continue to deal with it, and it's very simple. You just need to keep one eye open and one eye closed. But ask yourself, are you really happy now?