Post Date April, 15 2023
As I get older, I have seen many friends coming and going with whom I interact, as well as many changes in each person after entering marriage. Gradually, I have discovered a wonderful thing. When you choose a partner, you are also influenced by them, making you accidentally change. This is probably the so-called like-minded person. You can influence each other, so when you think about it carefully, do you accidentally become another type of person when interacting with different people? You will also make a difference by being with different people.
That's why some people fall in love and you think they've become more beautiful, while others become melancholic, unhappy, and haggard. A friend is married, and you can feel that her happiness in marriage does indeed affect her appearance. They say that whether a married woman looks beautiful or not is determined by her husband's love and happiness. Happiness and happiness are indeed written on one's face and cannot deceive anyone at all.
You will find that the quality of a relationship can affect a person's aura. If you love the wrong person, it feels like everything is going wrong, you lose confidence, and you become resentful and cynical towards yourself. Falling in love with someone who is not sure about you, you will lose your luster. Falling in love with someone who doesn't love you, you will live a life where you even dislike yourself. Falling in love with someone who looks down on you will make you feel insecure, deny yourself, lose your smile, and eventually you will also look down on yourself.
Even the love you talk about can affect your life. Not loving others properly can harm oneself, affect work and life disorder, and even worse if encountering a scary lover. Some people fall in love with the wrong person, and it takes them a lot of time to come out because of their hurt, resulting in physical and mental disorders. Some loves have affected your studies and work, causing you to make regretful choices. Some people even become 'wrong' because they love the wrong person, doing things that violate the law, harm themselves, or others, leading astray and losing themselves.
Some partners will give you extra points, while others will make you deduct points. Some partners will make you better, while others will make your life worse. Some partners will encourage and support you in everything, while others will only drag you down and consume you. (Actually, both love and friendship are)
Since I got married, many of my friends who have known me for many years have told me that my condition after marriage is better than before. Not only has I become more attractive, but my personality has also improved. My personality has become softer, more tolerant, and easier to get along with. Some friends have even said bluntly, 'This is really your husband's credit!'! Someone even said to me, 'Your face is different from before, now it's better than before.'. I laughed heartily after hearing this, but I don't deny it. After marriage, I have really changed a lot. I think the impact of my other half is really significant.
Taking myself as an example, I am no longer easily influenced by others (my self-awareness is quite strong). However, upon careful consideration, it is true that in my life, when interacting with different people, I am also influenced by others and become a different person. With nightclub enthusiasts, I also become very fond of going to nightclubs (now it's a waste of life to think of it). With insincere people, I also become insincere. I don't want to settle down for relationships that I don't want to settle down. When I encounter someone with a bad temper, I also become very hot. Although it can be said that one cannot only blame others, and one's own mentality at the time was also problematic, when you encounter someone, you will become that person to some extent. Even if you don't really want to be that kind of person, you will become 'not like yourself'.
This may also be a law of attraction, sometimes it's your own mindset that attracts that person, sometimes it's someone else that attracts you, and this is a force of mutual influence.
Looking back, those people who made you worse and less happy actually made you dislike who you were at the time. Human nature has both good and bad sides, but some objects will inspire the good side and others will inspire the bad side of you. The bad side of yourself that you dislike erupts because of being with the other person, such as selfishness, capriciousness, harshness, greed, and irrationality... In the end, you will become less fond of yourself because this is not the person you want to be!
Looking back on my own past, I once became a person who was suspicious, suspicious, deceitful, negative, abusive, and emotionally out of control. At that time, I really didn't like myself. The wrong person makes you feel even more wrong, and that feeling is really scary.
I have experienced many things in my life. Many good friends ask me what personality traits attract me to my partner, and I answer, "Integrity". Indeed, he is the most upright person of the opposite sex I know. I have met many different, outstanding, attractive, and charming boys before marriage, but they do not particularly attract me because I know that with them, I will not become a 'better me'. In the past, I might have thought that 'integrity' was not a very important personality option, but after experiencing many things, I realized that being able to have a good character and guide you in a good direction with that partner is the person who can truly help you grow.
I admit that I wasn't a very upright person in the past. I had many selfish and self centered thoughts, and I didn't feel that I needed to be more focused or upright in my emotions or life. I wasn't very considerate of others and lived only for myself. I have also met many people with excellent conditions but crooked personalities, and I also know many people who are emotionally disloyal and play games in life. I feel that it doesn't matter. In the past, I didn't think character was such an important thing. But since meeting my significant other, I have only realized how important it is to have a partner who will guide you in a good direction.
So I have changed a lot. I have become more considerate and empathetic. I have learned to be less selfish and willing to give more. I don't want to socialize with those bad friends because I know how to choose good friends instead of pursuing good relationships. I have also changed my personality and learned to be humble and self disciplined, because he always says to me, 'People should be humble.' So I don't blame others first, but rather think about whether to improve myself. My temper has improved because I understand the difficulties of others. I am willing to let others know because I no longer love face and worry about winning or losing. Instead, I am willing to take a step back and relax my heart.
I really like my current state because my other half is a mirror and the person who supports me the most and hopes for me to become better. I think this is a positive influence, the influence between partners really determines what kind of person you become.
A good partner will give you more positive energy, encourage you, support you, support you, and be willing to correct you and give you advice for your own good. A good partner will not deceive you, but will make you trust him wholeheartedly.
If a partner only fills you with negative energy and becomes the 'self you hate the most' (we have all experienced it before), then you should think carefully. Is such a partner really suitable for you?
True love is not just about me loving you and you loving me, but about hoping that the person you love becomes a better person, someone worth better, and someone worth being loved. If the person you love doesn't want you to be better or happier, then when will you spend yourself? Consuming oneself is not love.
The partner you choose will deeply affect what kind of person you become. Love can make you better, it can also make you worse, it can make you happy, and it can also make you abandon yourself.
Rather than being with someone who makes you feel worse, painful, self negative, and dislikes you, it's really better to be single and happy. Sometimes, don't deceive yourself. Are you the "right person"? You know better than anyone else, don't you?
